Op-Ed By: Dr. Tolu Olupona, Program Director of the Adult Psychiatry Residency Training Program, One Brooklyn Health’s Interfaith Campus 

It’s back-to-school season.   A time which brings lots of emotions for both children, adolescents and parents.  It is a time of transition.  These transitions include going from summer to academic season, making new friends, adjusting to new classes and change of routines from the leisure of summer to academic demands of fall.    As kids go back to school, they may experience worries about making new friends in school, how to manage academic pressure, fitting in with peer groups and adjusting to changes in their routines compared to their summer schedule. 

It is important for parents to know their children’s baseline in terms of functioning both at home and school as we enter this transition period.   This allows them to better recognize changes that may arise during this period.   

The first few weeks of school can be particularly important for parents to observe how their children are adjusting. Parents should pay attention to changes in mood, anxiety, or behavior. Changes in interest in school, becoming more withdrawn, avoiding school or reporting more physical symptoms such as headaches, stomach aches, increased tearfulness or increased difficulty with separation from caretakers may need further exploration.   These changes may be symptoms that a child is struggling emotionally. Some children may not verbalize their symptoms in words and may externalize their symptoms. 

Creating Open Communication at Home

It is very important for parents to have a non-judgmental stance, which enhances open communication when talking to children and adolescents about difficult topics. This can be especially important when children are navigating bullying, friendships, and other social pressures at school. Creating an environment where children feel comfortable talking starts with how parents listen and respond. 

Be empathetic and show understanding – Allow the child to feel heard. Use phrases such as “I understand your concerns” or “I understand where you are coming from.” 

Validate – Even if you disagree with your child’s ideas, validate understanding of their point of view and bring up your own point of view as opposed to dismissing the child or adolescent up front. 

Children thrive in validating environments that facilitate dialogue. 

Encourage the child to talk – Encourage expression of thoughts and ideas routinely at home so that the child feels comfortable talking about their problems. Let them see everyday conversations as routine and experience you as a safe space. 

Praise the child – Give children and adolescents feedback on what they are doing well. Be specific in the praise and label the behavior. 

Be nonjudgmental – Don’t be focused on your own judgment of the situation at hand and passing verbal judgment such as “you are an idiot” or “you are just lazy.” Instead, practice nonjudgment. Listen to what you hear and share your opinion in a non-judgmental manner that will not be perceived as an attack. 

The Importance of Healthy Routines

Children do well with consistent routines and expectations. 

They need good sleep, which research has shown helps their mood and anxiety symptoms. Limiting screen time has also been shown to improve mood, anxiety, and cognition. 

Knowing When Your Child May Need More Support

If a parent feels that the child has been deviating from their baseline both emotionally and behaviorally, this might be a cause for concern. Children and adolescents are facing a lot of pressure in their everyday lives, particularly those in high school. 

The pressure of making friends, fitting in, and academic pressures can take a toll. For adolescents applying for college, this is a particularly stressful time. They may need additional support and encouragement as they navigate the college application process. 

Mental Health Support at One Brooklyn Health

When additional support is needed, families can also turn to One Brooklyn Health for mental health services for children and adolescents. We have a child and adolescent mental health clinic and Child Comprehensive Psychiatry Emergency Room at the One Brooklyn Health Brookdale Hospital Campus.  At the One Brooklyn Health Interfaith Campus, we evaluate and treat children and adolescents at one of our outpatient clinics, Center for Mental Health. Your family doesn’t have to navigate it alone. Visit our website at www.onebrooklynhealth.org to learn more about One Brooklyn Health’s mental health services for children and adolescents.