Getting the Energy Up for Another School Year

Getting the Energy Up for Another School Year
If you’re a parent of a New York City School student and recognize the danger our children are in locked into a system where they’re required by law to attend schools whose failure is not based on test results but the growing threat on principals and teachers to focus on tests instead of developing the critical thinking skills the children need to succeed in life.    You must realize that some alternative approaches must be found to rescue the children from the expanding take over by corporate interests.  The Atlanta, Ga. Scandal of Cheating among school officials is not an isolated case.  We must see the danger of measuring our children’s intelligence and progress by standardized tests alone. We can no longer allow our children’s future to be determined by a corrupt system.
This press release caught my attention.  This organization’s target population is young adults/parents and while they cover other topics, their September session focuses on education.  In speaking to the organizers, I gathered that they hold a vision and are not merely waging an anti- campaign.
Good Brother Productions starts a new season of Nights at the Round Table.  Partnering with The Global Block Foundation, Good Brother Productions present a monthly panel discussion and networking mixer in Brooklyn called “Nights at the Round Table”.  Each Month we pick a different lounge or tavern in the neighborhood, and we put together unique panels for discussion on various topics pertinent to the lifestyles and social experiences of our community.
Our discussion in September deals with a very important topic, education. The discussion September 1st is entitled: “School Matters: A panel discussion about the education of our children.” We will discuss the state of the school system in general, and specifically in our communities. We will also discuss the advantages and disadvantages of Charter Schools, as well as their similarities, differences, and the issues that they share with Public Schools. We will discuss the things that parents can do at home to help in their children’s education, as well as some of the issues and struggles that educators face on a day-to-day basis.
On the panel will be: Fabayo Macintosh – Principal of Brighter Choice Community School, Shahara C. Jackson – Principal of Summit Academy School, Ana El Alston – Principal at Glen Cove City School District, and Jitu Weusi – lifelong Activist and Educator. The discussion is moderated by Marlon Rice, an author and activist from Clinton Hill.  The panel discussion will take place at For My Sweet located at 1103 Fulton Street between Classon Avenue and Claver Place, on Thursday September 1, 2011. The discussion starts at 7pm. The discussion will run an hour and a half, with a half hour Q &A followed by a mixer with live music, various vendors, and food and drink for sale. For further information: mrice@nysec.org, jaymash@gmail.com
Parents must reclaim family as the foundation and bridge to the future.
The Parent’s Notebook would love to share innovative actions being taken by parents and community taking responsibility for unleashing the innate intelligence of our children.  Send to parentsnotebook@yahoo.com

PN Alert!!!!
****from the desk of Assemblywoman Letitia James
All children 0 to 5 years who live within the five boroughs of NYC eligible for free books.

NYC Imagination Library is an initiative of the NYC Dept. of Education. The goal is to promote the development of emergent literacy and language skills by encouraging all NYC parents to read aloud to their children from birth until age five.

Enroll your preschool child (age 0 to 5 yrs) in the NYC Imagination Library and a new, carefully selected, age-appropriate book will be mailed each month in your child’s name directly to your home. Books will begin arriving at your home six to eight weeks after your registration form has been received, and will continue each month until your child turns five.

http://www.nyc.gov/html/nycha/downloads/pdf/NYC_Imagination_Library_application.pdf

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The Parent’s Notebook: Growing Genius

Growing Genius
In an ongoing search for ways  for parents to use   multiple intelligence theory to discover and unleash  their child’s innate genius,  I attended a screening of Independent Film New York (IFNY).   The founder of  IFNY,  Attika Torrence, introduced the filmmakers for Q & A.  I was moved by the synergy existing between the artists.   When I received the notice that IFNY was holding its Monologue GRAND Slam, I knew I would attend but I also wanted to know a little more about IFNY so I contacted Attika and his parents Robbo and Nassoma Torrence.

PN: What exactly is this Monologue GRAND Slam?
Attika: The Grand Slam is all of the previous year’s winners of the IFNY Monologue Slams competing against each other. It’s an acting event akin to American Idol, Def Comedy/Poetry Jam for actors. It is hosted by famed actor and 3-time
NAACP Award Winner Malik Yoba and co-hosted by  Miss Black USA 2010, Ms Osas.

PN: When did you decide to become an independent filmmaker?
Attika: While I was in college learning how to act.  I realized I needed to learn how to write and direct in order to maintain any kind of autonomy in this business. Actors are all at the mercy of casting directors, producers, directors, agents, etc. and I’m not good at being at anybody’s mercy… Upon graduating from LIU’s  Media Art Dept I wrote, produced, acted in and directed my first movie, Brotherly Love which starred 11 of New York’s top underground comedians at the time. I created IFNY in 2004  to fill the voids (that I saw and personally experienced) in the filmmaking community. Since then, we have produced the IFNY Premiere Film Screening Series (held at the Spike Lee Screening Room at LIU – Brooklyn) which provides an outlet for filmmakers to screen their films to an audience of film makers and film lovers. We’ve created the IFNY Monologue Slam and the IFNY Monologue GRAND Slam and most recently partnered with the Long Island University’s Continuing Education Department to bring a new certificate course entitled The Working Actor taught by Malik Yoba.

PN: How many  films have you made?
Attika: I’ve directed 6 movies, produced and acted in loads more.

PN: What role do you think films play in today’s culture.
Attika: Media as a whole is  huge and a major player in that medium is the film element. Films provide entertainment, education, it bridges gaps, it enlightens and has such a major influence on the ways people view themselves and others that it is incumbent upon us to control our
images.

Parents Perspective – …….
He  was a determined, strong-willed and focused child. He was very reasonable at an early age, which always amazed me. Once you explained things to him he understood your point and was willing to compromise.  He was a problem-solver and was always able to resolve issues  between his siblings and friends.
As a toddler he enjoyed being read to. In elementary school he enjoyed reading and writing and math was his favorite subject. As a pre teen he enjoyed rap and I purchased his first rap album for him, Rapper’s Delight by the Sugar Hill Gang.\
Attika was named Attika by his father, who said during my pregnancy, “If this is a boy, I’m naming him Attika.”  He felt that the 1972 Attica rebellion should not be forgotten. I wasn’t too thrilled about that, but looking up the word  in the Encyclopedia found Atticus was Greek and meant, marked by greatness, characteristic of the Athenians, applied to literary or artistic style, noted for its purity and elegance, I was okay with that, and we spelled it with a K instead of a C, thus Attika.

PN Alerts! ***Saturday, May 21st
***Roots Revisited continues its Underground Railroad College Tour with a trip to University of Maryland-Eastern Shore and the birthplace of Harriet Tubman.   An educational experience for fourth-graders and up includes bus transportation, tours and lunch.  For more information call 718-574-5482 or 718-778-0009, ext. 17.

***The Noel Pointer Foundation holds its 3rd Annual Social and Recital at the Brooklyn Children’s Museum, 145 Brooklyn Ave.   11am – 4pm featuring free ice cream, face painting, instrument demonstration, games and raffle prizes with admission..
For info: 718-230-4825 or npf.nyc@gmail.com
***IFNY GRAND SLAM Competition – 7:30 – 10:30 pm.  The Kumble Theatre for the Performing Arts, 1 University Plaza, Bklyn. Contact. www.kumbletheatre.org.

Parent’s Notebook: Regardless of the Family Makeup…The Job Description is the same

Whether the topic is poor performance in school or juvenile crime, the issues of no father in the home, teenage mothers or grandparents or others as guardian immediately surface, the composition of today’s families become the focus rather than the needs of the child.
The appearance of families documents the social revolution of this culture. High divorce rates and increased sexual activity among singles create one-parent homes or homes with step-parents, single women birthing and raising children alone, same sex partners, large numbers of children in foster care all contribute to the changes in a family’s composition. Add to these the fact that today more mothers are employed outside the home than ever before (if they haven’t lost their jobs in this current downturn), possibly altering the effectiveness of the traditional two-parent home.
Given all the possible appearances of today’s families, its job remains the same. From the beginning of time the family has been the foundation of society, being its smallest unit. A child is nurtured in the family. Moral, spiritual, educational and social development begins there. Relationships ( healthy or not) with family last a lifetime and create the pattern for future relationships because it is within the family that children form a sense of who they are and that will influence or determine the choices they make in life.
My childhood was marred by a father whom I loved dearly returning home from work out of town on weekends drunk, cursing and threatening my mother who would grab me and flee the house, staying at a neighbors until he sobered up and returned to his quiet norm.
Around the age of four, my mother’s leaving me with my father as I cried to go with her to church  (because my hair was not combed)  led to my interpretation that I was not good enough. After taking numerous human potential workshops, I uncovered the emotional scars and healed them. Until that time my relationships with men and women were replicas of that with my mother and I have longed for peaceful relationships among people.
The importance and impact of family has not changed. The statistics that institutions publicize as theirs — whether it is schools, prisons, foster care agencies or other — are really statistics on the effectiveness of families.
The time is now for us to heal ourselves so that we heal our families and restore the village. We’ve been programmed to give parenting its props.
When institutions become responsible for the education and socialization of our children, failure is the only predictable outcome. The average of 20 youth to one adult (before Mr. Bloomberg’s cut) insures that. When the family and community abdicate their responsibility, our children become fodder for the maintenance and expansion of government businesses, i.e. Special Ed, Foster Care, Prisons and Military. While government statistics are just that – numbers, the family and community are intimately affected by the plight of the human being behind the statistic.
Children have needs and unless those needs are met, we can expect behaviors ranging from low achieving to destructive. Plants need varying amounts of water, light and soil to thrive. Those needs are non-negotiable. Children’s needs are also non-negotiable. What are we, adults, going to do?
We can begin to check our interaction with children. These are behaviors which lower feelings of self-worth. Do you 1) tell them they are bad 2) tell them they’re good only when they behave properly 3)constantly catch them doing something wrong 4) calling child names like shorty, dumbo, fatso, etc. 5) give orders without explaining why or say do it because I say so 6)always do and think for them, 7) harshly criticize child when a mistake is made 8)speak for your child instead of allowing him or her to speak for self.
If you checked any one of these, you have an invitation to explore with me in the journey toward discovering the child’s individual intelligences, converting behaviors to needs and doing the same for self. Email: parentsnotebook@yahoo.com

Parents’ Notebook Alert!!!
***There are opportunities for youth ages 14 – 18 to participate in the Youth Justice Board, an after-school program (2011-2012). The program allows young people to learn firsthand how important decisions are made at the City level, and to influence local policy and practice. Members receive a stipend. Applications due June 24th. For further info: call 646-386-5925.

Parents Notebook: Reflections on Mother’s Day

Nazim, my 10-year-old grandson asked why they didn’t want to show bin Laden’s pictures.  This question led to my sharing my dismay with killing and revenge.  While we both felt sympathy for the September 11th victims, we also sympathized with the countless victims of wars period, those in other countries.  Nazim suggested the Armed Forces carry a “Truce Flag” and that both sides be ordered to work on finding a truce – no truce was not an option.  I shared with him that my vision was Peace on the Planet and that we, humans, have a long way to go.  And I also told him that his truce theory could begin with each of us and members of our family.
The conversation with Nazim took place while I drove him to school.  We had reached a nonverbal truce after the prior morning’s drive was filled with him being disgruntled and complaining because I insisted we return home for him to pick up his book bag that he discovered he didn’t have.  He was trying to convince me he didn’t need it because of exams, and getting more and more upset with me, saying I was making him late for the test and he would have to take it over at the end of the year.  The debate went on for the entire trip.  When I told him I got that he was debating and had to be right.  He insisted we were having a conversation.  Needless to say I did a lot of deep breathing.  And here we were the next day, back to cooperative conversations, him sharing a passage from the book he was reading and asking me the meaning of the word “Caddie”.   But then it has always been observed that children fight one minute and resume playing the next.  It’s adults who muffle their anger but hold grudges for decades and because we don’t get rid of the anger, it holds us prisoner and we declare war on each other, killing the relationships that we need to prosper, relationships necessary to create peace, necessary for saving the planet.  So the question I pose is how do we allow  the children to lead us – to save us – to save the planet.
I’ve been in this classroom for half a century and I’m still learning.  As a grandparent, I see that it’s less about me so I empathize with parents – dealing with the pressures – may grow impatient and the emotional and spiritual needs of children are usurped by material wants.
.In raising  SMART children , the S is the foundation on which everything else depends.  It stands for Self-Worth which describes how your child sees him or her self as a person.  It starts with  how parents and others close  view him.  We, mothers,  fathers ,grandparents, aunties, uncles plant the seeds of self-worth or unworthiness in our daily interactions with our children.   We need to own this role and know that we and our children must know that we are worthy and that worthiness can not be defined by others..
1.  Explore various methods of self-discovery and self-knowledge.  The multiple -intelligence inventory is a simple way of children having their interests and strengths being affirmed.  In African and other cultures, expectant mothers received readings of the child to learn the child’s purpose. These religious practices still exist here.    Numerology and Astrology are non-religious methods.   You’ll be able to recognize what’s true and ultimately decide the credibility of the information.  We must find our way back to SELF and allow our children to know themselves so they can create a better world.
2.  Self-Confidence is the other S component and it’s measured by behavior.  A child may be self-confident at home but become shy and withdrawn in other environments.  We can increase self-confidence in needed areas by creating ways for child to overcome – NOT by ridiculing or forcing.   My granddaughters, Nailah and Malaika were terrified of dogs at one time….every encounter on the sidewalk was met with extreme fright and hysteria.  I bought a colorful notebook and informed them that they would earn a star for every dog that they passed without freaking out.  And at the end of the week, a certain percentage of dogs met without hysteria would earn a treat.  This practice grew from hesitancy to wanting to cross the street in order to meet the dog and Malaika having to be discouraged from touching dogs.
This Mother’s Day, I invite Mothers and/or Grandmothers to join me in Raising SMART children, transforming problems into projects and making family work.  email
parentsnotebook@yahoo.com or call 718-783-0059 for more info

Parent’s Notebook

Circling the Wagons –
What do we as a people owe to and want for our children?  The answers will probably differ from person to person.  If we focus on the differences and insist one’s own answer is the correct one and the others are wrong – the result will be the continued quagmire where the focus is on personalities instead of systemic policies.  A dialogue about effective and meaningful education for our children must include eliminating layers of ineffective, destructive policies within the school system or rescuing them from the system.  A prerequisite for both  requires defining and agreement  on what a  meaningful education is.  We tend to gather and give energy to something or someone that we’re against but don’t establish agreement on a common definition of what’s needed – in other words, a common vision.
The recent event, “Healthy Black Child Development in the Age of Racism – The Challenges of Surviving & Navigating the School System”, sponsored by BNYEE, SEEDS, The MANY, and CPE presented a clear picture of the mental and emotional challenges African- Americans face.
Dr. Jamila Codrington, psychologist specializing in children, adolescents and families, cited systemic factors such as funding cuts, overcrowding, large numbers of Special Ed and ESL students, lack of culturally responsive teaching.  Then followed a long list of familial factors citing that one in every 10 young person is affected by a serious emotional disturbance.

Dr. Robert Andrews, psychiatrist,  shared the effects of stress and trauma on child development.  Mental, physical and sexual abuse adds up cumulatively to emotional trauma that affects behavior, interpersonal relations.  Emotional wounds, left untreated, plays a role in the lack of motivation which produces large percentages of Black children, especially boys in Special Ed, and fueling the pipeline from the education system to juvenile jails.  Until each of us takes a stand and makes a commitment to our children, they will continue to be an endangered species.
Black New Yorkers for Educational Excellence and the Coalition For Public Education are necessary resources for relevant information about the school system.  At home we must create ways to support our children in 1) realizing their gifts, 2) motivating them to excel, 3) providing them opportunities to create results. WE CAN NO LONGER ALLOW OUR CHILDREN’S LIVES TO BE DETERMINED BY OTHERS.
Home Works! Problem-to-Project is our contribution to empowering children and their families.  Projects are chosen after parents’ children list areas of concern separately, beginning the process by creating a win-win vision to work toward.  Adults and children are acknowledged for each step and their empowerment comes from experiencing the change  they make in their environment.  Not only do we create empowered individuals but sorely needed  collaborative skills.  For a detailed outline of programs, e-mail: parentsnotebook@yahoo.com.
PN Alerts!
**Ages Birth to 5 years – StoryPlay with First RIF at Bedford Library – Fridays 11:00 AM to 12:00 PM.  Earn free books with RIF.  Info: call 718-623-0012.
**The African Film Festival continues through May 31st .For schedules and sites visit www.africanfilm.org.   Kirikou. a kid’s favorite,  returns in Kirikou and the Wild Beasts late May at Brooklyn’s BAMcinematek.

**WBGO’s 2011 Spring Kids Jazz Concert Series continues April 30th at Newark Museum and May 7th at NJPAC/Victoria Theatre.  FREE – adults must be accompanied by a child.
Visit www.wbgo.org/kids for updates.  Newark Penn Station is a 23-minute ride on PATHtrain.

** OBT (Opportunities for a Better Tomorrow): Provides on-the-job training/apprenticeship for urban youth in two locations in Brooklyn. For More info: www.obtjobs.org
**Summer Youth Employment Program (SYEP) – a seven-week summer employment initiative open to youth ages 14 – 24 who work up to 25 hours a week earning $7.25 perhour. Must apply by May 27th.  For info call 311 or 1-800-246-464
**May 31:Application deadline for Teens and Businesses/Mentors who would like to participate in the Emmanuel Baptist Church Community Development Corporation’s Teens That Mean Business (TTMB) summer youth program. For more information: www.teensmeanbusiness.com.

The Parent’s Notebook

The Parents Notebook

Keeping the Spirit of Harriet Tubman Alive           

                  In an effort to get a sense of what our children were experiencing, I started looking at  the practices of adults, looking for signs that we were preparing them to make this country value human life more than money.   Holiday observations became suspect.  I gave up on Thanksgiving because the plight of the indigenous people was completely omitted.  I was even suspect about Black History Week’s expansion to a month.  I wondered if we used our history makers as proof to our young that they too have come with a purpose and the ability to make a difference.  Or did we simply use them to compete with white America’s history makers?  Do we acknowledge the innate genius waiting to unfold in each and every child – to affirm and expect their ability to make history? Or have we bought into the lie that intelligence is defined by  and only bestowed among a few?

While we celebrate the actions our history makers took or the words they spoke, how much do we know about the values that determined the choices they made? Exploring quotations from Black history makers, I was especially moved by two quotes attributed to Harriet Tubman.

 “Always remember you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world”- Harriet Tubman

The current upheaval in the school system  indicates a need and an opportunity to step back and plan a People’s Movement for the Children.  Adults have done a great job of fighting each other over the years on whether it was integration of schools or  community control of schools.  Time and energy that could have been devoted to making the educational system more meaningful for the children , to redefine success, to track post- high school accomplishments (when was college entrance designated the epitome of success and by whom?).  What happened to the Independent Black School Movement? That’s not a rhetorical question.. I’d like to know and I think we, adults,  could learn lessons that would benefit the children.

The above quote by Harriet Tubman strikes a core realization – we can’t remember what we’ve never known.  Where have you learned that you possess the qualities she cites in this quote?

And if you did, specifically who facilitated that lesson?  These qualities emanate  from  an environment that is free from fear or threat; where physical needs are met, and where one experiences love, affection, human contact and a sense of belonging.  That’s the foundation that’s needed  for our children to recognize  and pursue their passion.  Schools are structured to provide pedagogy. The job of emotional grounding is up to us.  Let’s face it -  our job is healing our relationships and organizing our homes to provide our children with the strength, the patience and the passion to reach for the stars.  When we do that, they will change the schools and the world.  

 “I freed thousands of slaves.  I could have freed thousands more if only they knew they were slaves.”-Harriet Tubman

The lesson here is each and everyone has their own perspective.  We waste time debating,  challenging, attacking  those with different points of view that could and should be spent on proactive movement to solve the problem as we see it.  The goal should be to state the problem as clearly as possible as  well as agreeing upon and prioritizing the proposed causes. We’re then ready

to attack the causes.  During the course of the work, others who didn’t realize there was a problem may see it differently or they may not.  The important thing is that those who did exert their energy will receive the benefits from making a difference.  Harriet Tubman made a difference with the thousands that recognized they were slaves.  We who recognize that home is the  base of empowerment for our children can empower ourselves and our  children who will change their schools and the  world.            

E-mail parentsnotebook@yahoo.com  for information  about Home Works! Empowering parents to raise Smart Motivated Achieving Responsible Team-oriented Youth.

The Parent’s Notebook: The transformation of a nation begins in the homes of its people

September has been an emotionally charged month for me, beginning with my 70th birthday celebration hosted by my children and grandchildren.  I was moved by the loving energy that existed in the space where people from many different sectors converged and I totally  felt loved.  I was especially moved by the words of my offspring (mellowed a lot since adolescence) and their offspring (grandparents are always winners).  I was especially moved by Adonis, 11, who told his dad that he really enjoyed the party, and another ll-year-old  who danced with my grandson and me, told me as they were leaving: “This was the best party”.The month culminated with the film Waiting for Superman, the documentary exposing the dismal state of education in America. On a billboard were the words “The fate of our country won’t be determined on the battlefield – it will be determined in the classroom”. Observing my children and the experiences of raising them and observing them parenting my grandchildren, I say the fate of the country depends on parents sending self-confident and motivated children into the classroom, assuming an informed and participating  partnership with the educators and refusing to get drawn into the struggles between factions, insisting they stay on track…providing opportunities for your child’s genius to expand.While deploring the statistics presented in the film, seeing  large  numbers of parents who were obviously involved and actively pursuing better schools for their children reduced to a number and dependent on that number being drawn from hundreds and the tears and anxiety on the faces of the students made my heart ache and the tears flow.  I cry because we have allowed ourselves to become totally dependent on alien systems.  Overcoming dependency requires us to heal our relationships with self and others.  SAVING OUR CHILDREN is up to us…turning our homes into  training camps. Beginning January 1970 and ending January 1976, I gave birth to five children, making me the mother of seven children.  Two older sons died and I gained another daughter and son,  Debbie and Daniel, through marriage.     Needless to say, it was a busy time with the five so close in age.  Fortunately, the EAST became the community where values were shared – I could contribute my skills and continue to grow while my children attended Imani Day Care and Uhuru Sasa allowing some much-needed separate time for us all.  Dealing with five determined, opinionated children 12 years and under was challenging to put it nicely.  Dealing with those five during adolescence was downright scary.  I enrolled  in my first parent workshop and I was amazed and eternally grateful for the information that helped me survive the turbulent teens.    Over the years I watched them mature – from physical fights quelled by emergency family meetings where everyone was allowed to vent their feelings.  Each sentence had to begin with “I felt (blank) when”.  The sessions would always end with them going to the store for snacks, arms around each other. Now as adults, they pursue their individual interests, support each other and they’ve got my grandchildren’s backs. They include the three adult children of my oldest son, Pamoja.  In fact, the girls, Asha and Afriyie,  handled the decorations for my party while Gyasi (Jah-C) was MC and DJ.   While living and working in Kentucky, Makini could allow Dakari, 13, to fly to New York for basketball tournaments, and  Kweli or Kojo were at the airport to meet him and to get him to Coach Tommy.  Kweli’s youngest, Nazim, has spent summers in Kentucky… Kojo, father of three girls, is a great mentor for his nephews; Michael, a freshman at Coppin State, and  Dakari, a high school freshman, being their unofficial basketball coach.  Hazina and Daniel, living in Birmingham, travel to connect with Makini and Dakari when there’s a  tournament in a Southern city.  Auntie Nandi is planning to have her nieces and nephews come to New Orleans for a week.  Being an only child, I am amazed at their connectedness and also with their friends whom I’ve inherited.  And I truly see that regaining  Africans’ highest-held  value of relationships between persons is the battle to be fought and won.  In retrospect, I give their father and me an “A” for not comparing them to each other or others, for allowing them to express their opinions and make choices,  for assigning them areas of responsibility and for tolerating their protests.   Each of them is an advocate in some area or another.  And home is the place where it began.

Parents Notebook: Empowering Children at Home

Power is synonymous with authority, control, influence, supremacy, clout or dominance.   Gubernatorial candidate Charles Barron articulates the mission of the Freedom Party as accessing power for the masses of people.  Gaining power on the political front will require unity and unity depends on  individuals’ ability to exchange capitalist-honed values from “What’s in it for me?” to “What works for all?”  If African-American parents can take the lead,  empowering our children rather than raising them to fit into the current value cycle, we will add energy to the Freedom Party while ensuring its sustainability by preparing empowered individuals to continue the work.  It’s time we took responsibility for changing  the systems that impact our lives.
Regent Adelaide Sanford’s report, “Perform or Perish”, challenged parents, children, teachers, administrators, school boards and elected government officials to contribute to achieving excellence in education for all children.  Each group was given a “to do” list. In her wisdom, parents were numbered one on the list.  According to Regent Sanford, “Parents letting children know every day that they are capable of success and ensure that their children set high expectations.
In a sane and orderly society, parents are responsible for the well-being of their children and that responsibility is accompanied by influence and power.  In this society, parents are virtually rendered powerless as they are made the needy component in an agency’s profile.  The first step in empowering your child in education and life is taking responsibility, an attitude that “the buck stops here”.  Making a distinction between  responsibility and blame gives rise to power.
Being a parent is a challenging task in a capitalistic culture which must have  needy populations to survive.  Children and parents are separated early by parents having to work and time spent nurturing family cultures diminish and relationships are strained if not downright antagonistic.  We are faced with the task of reaching into the rubbish, healing our wounds so we can take deep breaths and allow our children to express their innate gifts.  The lesson we adults must learn is that we have been programmed to “Not know who we really are”.  We’ve been programmed to look outside ourselves for some material sign that we’re okay and we pass that on to our children. In short, we’ve turned our power over to others.  Human beings are never more loving and free than in infancy and early childhood.  And they learn to crawl, stand, walk, talk, feed themselves without classes, so I think that says a lot about children’s innate ability to learn.  So let’s begin the steps to empowerment.
Step 1 – Accept your connection to Source – whatever you call it.  We’re all unique expressions.  As you accept your own uniqueness and uncover your purpose and passion, you’ll automatically create space for your child to explore and discover theirs.
Step 2- Accept the fact that people see things differently.  While you and another may be observing the same thing, each of you are viewing it through personalized lens and perhaps giving it a different meaning.  That goes for your child, as well as others.  We’ve been programmed not to tolerate differences.  From family squabbles to International wars, the core cause is intolerance of differences.  If we can accept, tolerate and communicate differences with our children while seeking a common goal, we heighten their self-esteem by letting them know their opinions are valued.
Step 3 – Include them in home management.  Hold family meetings, assign or allow them to choose duties for one-or-two week periods.  Depending on age, they can feed pets, wash dishes, inventory and write shopping lists, in stores, find items on list; examine sales papers to find best prices, at Checkout, making sure the price shown on shelf and the one rung up are the same.  Include them in family-and-school related  problem-solving.  These are many ways to allow children to participate and by participating they gain a sense of making a difference..something they will take into the classroom and all other areas of life -   “I  am capable”.  Remember, Nelson Mandela herded sheep at the age of five.
PN Alerts!!!!!!
From Councilman Vann
**Free Community Tennis Program – on-site registration – Foundation Academy, 70 Tompkins Ave. – Mon., Wed, Fri. 9-12.  Call 347-417-8154
Funded by Council member Al Vann and Speaker Christine C. Quinn
**LIU’s Liberty Partnership Program for High School rising Juniors and Seniors.   Call now 718-488-100,0 ext. 3056-Bklyn residents only.

Sister’s Community Hardware – Paying Homage to Black History and Women’s History Months

Sister’s Community Hardware, located at 990 Fulton Street between Washington and Waverly Avenues since 2002, attracts the attention of pedestrians and motorists during the day or night.  The store’s front is all glass.  By day, an artist’s rendition of a giant globe encircled by children of diverse ethnicities holding hands is easily visible. At night, decorative exterior lights exposes the name of the store carved in a wooden plaque as well as the globe.  If the name  Sister’s Hardware didn’t attract attention, the gateless artistic glass window with a view of the merchandise inside certainly would.

Unity as in Partnership
 Maulana Karenga’s first Kwanzaa Principle is Umoja/Unity and evidence continues to mount that until we, African-Americans, heal our relationships with each other, we will not attain the remaining principles.  Sister’s Community Hardware is a partnership between Atchutda Bakr and Robert Bridges.  When asked what he felt the necessary ingredients were for a successful partnership, he answered “1. Common view of the world; 2. Common value system; 3. Common interests; and 4. Common aspirations”. 
Stating that he and Atchutda shared those in common and their meetings were geared towards “How to get things done, not haggling about what.” Bob agreed that the same principles apply in successful relationships period and certainly apply for business.
A common concern to portray positive perceptions resulted in the decision not to use gates, making a statement against the stereotype about the Black community and crime.  “We’ve been here eight years with no incidents.”  Since men are usually connected to hardware, they thought Why not a Sister’s Hardware Store and .Why not a Black Sister’s Hardware Store?  Hanging on the walls are 1 « X 2 « ft. photographs of Ida B. Wells, Toni Morrison, Alice Walker, Ella Baker, Fannie Lou Hamer and Septima Clark.

The Partners
Atchutda Bakr was born in Bedford-Stuyvesant, attended P.S. 93, JHS 258 and Wingate High School, the oldest of four daughters born to Robert and Marjorie Henderson.  There is evidence that Atchutda exhibited strong managerial skills at an early age since her mother entrusted her with the care of her younger siblings. Atchutda has two children – Tracy Benjamin, an attorney living in Maryland and practicing government transactions and litigations and Ali Henderson, Brooklyn, who’s a member of the store’s team.  When five-year-old Brian, her only grandchild. comes to town, Atchutda invites youngsters for playdates and becomes the chef for the occasions.
In 1975, Atchutda joined the EAST Organization, working in the headmaster’s office.  She was transferred to the Uhuru Food Co-op where she worked until she left to manage Jitu Weusi’s campaign for City Council in 1985 and became active in the Black United Front. She handled field operations in the campaigns of Roger Green, Stan Kinard, Bob Law, Job Mashariki, Al Sharpton and Dennis Rivera’s campaign for President of the 1199 Union. In 1989, she ran for City Council against Enoch Williams, garnering 49 percent of the vote. She worked for 1199 as coordinator of a Home Mortgage Program, designed a Homeowner Education program that aided 1,000 people in purchasing homes.
Robert “Bob” Bridges joined the newly formed Black United Front (BUF) and became a member of its Economic Development Committee along with Mel Corbett and Mark Hinckson. It was here that Atchutda and Bob met.  As a BUF project from 1983 to 1985, they operated “Our Heroes” at Uhuru Food Co-op, 1107 Fulton St., a sandwich shop selling heroes with names such as Marcus Garvey, Rosa Parks, Malcolm X, Ella Baker, Jesse Jackson, Martin L. King and Sojourner Truth priced at $2.50 to $3.75 with a Reaganomics Special selling for 75 cents.
In 1985, Bob, Mel and Atchutda formed the New Horizon Management and Development Company, managing 30 buildings in Fort Greene and Clinton Hill.  They purchased seven buildings and sold most of them.  The company dissolved in 1990. Bob and Mel opened Brother’s Community Hardware Store on Myrtle Avenue in 1989.  As Brother’s was closing in 2001, Atchutda was looking for a partner. Having done an internship at Pratt in Community Development – Regional & City Planning, she said a Pratt Area Community Council survey had determined that the community needed a drugstore, hardware store, and book store.  “I wasn’t a pharmacist, wasn’t really up to a book store so Hardware was my choice.”  So the partnership for “Sister’s” was formed.
Atchutda says her biggest challenge at Sister’s has been learning over 5,000 different products that the store carries while her greatest reward is being able to employ locals.  The workers are trained to treat all customers with decency whether they’re a homeless person buying tape or a well-dressed rich individual.   She also says a neat, organized store leads to good customer service.
I often compare the customer service at Sister’s to that at Trader Joe’s. Bob, Ali, Richard, Aaron, Fallou and Mohammed make customers feel valued.  Their energy and availability is rare.

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